Update

Sorry everyone, I apologise for the distinct lack of reports over the past 10 days. I have not had access to the web or a pc.

Nevertheless, I endeavour to be back on board by the weekend at the latest.

And boy isnt there a heap to catch up on...

Ashes Test 1 and 2 - Double heartbreak for the Aussies.
Le Tour - Bye bye Cadel, Hello Astana - the Kazak super team and the most famous thing to come out of the country since Borat.
Athletics - Bolt unleashes the fury on a wet track in Paris to sizzle to 9.79 (into a headwind no less)
AFL - The Hawks are coming back, the swans are nosediving, the bombers are gathering speed, the dockers are still woeful, the Cats are back on the tin rough running hot and the saints....well can anyone beat them?
Union - Round 1 of Bledisloe goes to the All Blacks meaning that the Wallabies have to win all three remaining matches. Now on the Springboks and the politically incorrect quote making machine De Villiers
League - Origin punch up evokes memories of an old WWF all in brawl
Soccer - Summer madness....no such thing as a bargain with prices of average players now costing more than a squadron of F1-11 fighter jets.
Plus Tennis, Hockey, Baseball, Motor Racing, and much much more (but definitely no curling).

Till the weekend...

The Ashes 2009

In a series more anticipated than a Hollywood blockbuster or George Bush's resignation, Australia take on England  in the first test match of the Ashes 2009 tonight.

There will be more tired Australian employees turning up to work over the next few months than there were Merv Hughes ear licks. It was bad enough with the Tour De France but now with the Ashes also on tv, bosses should be considerate for the leather and willow fanatics.

Breaking News

Drama has started even before the first ball being bowled. Australia has made a shock selection decision by overlooking Stuart Clarke and selecting Nathan Hauritz instead. The only logic behind this decision must be that Clarke bowled a ball in training that had hints of our old PM John Howard's bowling style (see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGqTayhu5QM). 

Whilst it was rumoured that Cardiff would produce a spinning wicket, Hauritz has been struggling to turn a corner let alone turn the ball and pick up wickets in the tour matches. He has been struggling so much so that he might even struggle to pick up swine flu in Victoria. It is a very interesting decision by the Australian selection committee that will be hailed should Australia succeed in the test match, and lambasted should they fail.

England have a strong improving team with a good balance of youth and experience. Anyone thinking that it will be a walkover for the Baggy Greens, should keep walking past the TAB and leave the wallet in the back pocket. Australia's team selection should only further support this and similarly add to England's confidence.

Whatever the outcome of the first test, it is winter here in Australia and it does not feel quite right watching Cricket at all hours of the night and without an esky full of drinks, but there are no complaints here. 

www.baggygreen.com.au 

www.smh.com.au

Le Tour - Stage 4

Last night saw the team time trial stage (absent from the tour since 2005) which at times resembled an episode of 'Its a knockout' or 'Wipeout'. 

The crashes were spectacular (see team BBox) and comical (see Menchov, Ballan and Van Den Broeck), and ultimately affected some of the serious contenders, namely Evans, Menchov and Sastre.

What the stage also illustrated was the potential rift that could undermine Astana's tour aspirations. During the warm up the tension between Armstrong and Contador was more obvious that Dolly Parton's cleavage in a bikini.  Whilst you cannot argue with Armstrong's desire to succeed, you have to empathise for Contador who must be feeling like the black sheep with so many people cheering for his 'number 2' rider Armstrong. It will be interesting to see if Armstrong continues with his surge at the expense of his own team mate or whether he learns to take a back seat and do the role that he was apparently hired to do, that is, help Contador to win the Tour.

Last nights results were:

1. Astana 46 minutes 29 seconds
2. Garmin-slipstream + 18 secs
3. Saxo-Bank +40 secs
4. Liquigas +58 secs
5. Columbia + 59 secs

Overall standings:

1. Cancellara (Swi/Saxo Bank) 10 hrs 38 mins 7 secs
2. Armstrong (US/Astana) same time
3. Contador (Spa/Astana) +19 secs
4. Kloden (Ger/Astana) +23 secs
5. Leipheimer (US/Astana) +31 secs

http://www.letour.fr/us/homepage_courseTDF.html

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/more_sport/cycling/article6659958.ece

Le Tour - Day 3

Its fast turning into the Mark Cavendish show. 

Lets hope either the other cyclists find some form quickly or Cavendish has numerous tyre blowouts, punch ups with other cyclists (as he apparently did in Stage 2) and sustains more dead legs than the fat kid in the playground. Failing that, it will be reminiscent of a formula one season when Schumacher dominated from start to finish. 

As unlikely as that may be, Cavendish is, however, fast approaching the hills and that will surely be his downfall. The man can sprint but he sure as hell cant climb. Nevertheless, Cavendish is currently riding a wave of success on the flats brought about by some solid training and some equally impressive natural ability. 

Last night, saw some other interesting moves with Armstrong jumping ahead of his team mate Contador in the overall standings. So the main question is just who really is the team leader of Astana? 

Stage results:

1. Mark Cavendish (GB/Team Columbia) 5 Hours 1 minute 24 seconds
2. Thor Hushovd (Nor/Cervelo) same time
3. Cyril Lemoine (Fra/Skil-Shimano) "
4. Samuel Dumoulin (Fra/Cofidis) "
5. Jerome Pineau (Fra/Quick Step) "

Overall, the standings are:

1. Fabian Cancellara (Swi/Saxobank) 9 hours 50 minutes 58 seconds
2. Tony Martin (Ger/Columbia) + 33 secs
3. Lance Armstrong (USA/Astana) + 40 secs
4. Alberto Contador (Spa/Astana) +  59secs
5. Bradley Wiggins (GB Garmin) + 1 Min

http://www.letour.fr/indexus.html 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/other_sports/cycling/8137119.stm 

Le Tour - Day 2

British sprint king Mark Cavendish served it up to the favourites and underlined his green jersey ambitions with a comprehensive victory in the 187km second stage. Cavendish, with significant support from his Columbia team members, began his sprint to the line early but maintained his speed and held off all challenges to raise his arms at the finish line.

Wearing a top that made him look like he has Peter Andre's abs (back when he could sort of sing) Cavendish made the top look justified and lived up to his own expectations of finishing stages strongly.

In last year's Tour, Cavendish won 4 stages before pulling out to concentrate on the Olympics in Beijing. After only one stage of this year's Tour, Cavendish looks like he is back on track faster than the Coyote chasing the Road Runner.

Last nights results were as follows:

1. Mark Cavendish (GB/Team Columbia) 4 hours 30 minutes 2 seconds
2. Tyler Farrar (USA/Garmin-Slipstream) same time
3. Romain Feillu (Fra/Agritubel) "
4. Thor Hushovd, (Nor/Cervelo) "
5. Yukiya Arashiro (Jap/Bouygues Telecom) "

Overall Standings:

1. Fabian Cancellara (Swi/Saxobank) 4 hours 49 minutes 34 seconds
2. Alberto Contador (Spa/Astana) + 18 secs
3. Bradley Wiggins (GB/Garmin) +19 secs
4. Andreas Kloden (Ger/Astana) +22 secs
5. Cadel Evans (Aus/Silence) +23 secs

http://www.letour.fr/indexus.html

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/more_sport/cycling/article6643189.ece

Federer the King

Last night Roger Federer became the greatest male tennis player of all time with 15 grand slam titles.

Pete Sampras, the man Federer overtook, was in the stands to watch the final, suggesting that the result perhaps was a fait accompli. However, the match was anything but as it was an epic five set match that lasted just over 4 and a quarter hours. Federer finally overcame a dogged Andy Roddick 16-14 in the last set.

Of something to interest any Swiss nationals, spotted outside the All England Tennis club was a petition to have Federer become an English citizen. Clearly the English are resorting to all measures to have an 'Englishman' win Wimbledon. Further to that point, it seems the English are blinded by the fact that 'their' other great hope, Andy Murray, is a Scotsman! Seems Australian's are not alone in claiming 'locals' (see Crowded House, Russel Crowe, and many rugby league players) as their own.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/tennis/8133424.stm

Sports Wrap

Weekend wrap up.

AFL: Hawks belted by the Bulldogs, Swans back to winning ways with narrow win over the Kangaroos, Saints hang on for a thriller win over the Cats, Blues beat the Dockers by 15, Crows win away against hapless Tigers, Port surprise Lions, Pies pump the Bombers, and Demons win over the Eagles and dedicate to Stynes.

NRL: Panthers edge out Parra in try-filled thriller, Titans stumble against Raiders, Storm defeat bug-ridden Knights, Bowen-inspired Cowboys put Sharks back on loosing path, Souths taught a lesson by Tigers, Broncos win over Warriors but at a huge cost, Dragons prove title credentials with solid win over Roosters.

Union: Lions salvage pride with biggest ever win over Springboks in 3rd and final test. Springbok coach De Villiers proves that his one liners are absolutely ludicrous and should be highlight of Tri-Nations series (only to be outdone if his players all play cleanly?).

Cycling: Cancellara proves that even though he may be Swiss, there are no holes in his time trial strategy (couldn't help myself). Armstrong proves that age, celebrity, and a mysterious 4th child are no barrier to success. Boonen proves that you can train on the white line even when he is not cycling and still race in Le Tour.

Cricket: The Aussies have no spinner and no Watson (surprise surprise the poor bugger is injured again), but can stack the team with batsmen and hopefully retain the ashes by batting the English into submission (not hindered at all by Harmison's shock omission from England's ashes squad and Englands reliance on James Anderson). Aussies finished the tour match against the Lions with more runs than an Indian curry. Also someone called Brett Lee made an impact with the ball...

Tennis: Williams sisters prove that all of those years of backyard tennis pays off yet again by winning the Wimbledon doubles, and Serena prevailing over her sister Venus in the singles. Tonight Federer has chance of becoming the one and only tennis megastar should he win his 15th gland slam title. No pressure Roger...

Athletics: Oslo golden league - Powell wins the 100m in Bolts absence, Sanya Richards wins the womens 400m in a 2009 world leading time, whilst Swedish superstar Carolina Kluft fouls her way through the entire long jump to record nothing at all.

Curling: At the risk of ostracising the huge Curling fraternity, does anyone else really care about this sport and the recent results?

Odd Spot: Ricardo Thomassen wins the Norwegian national snow ball throwing championships throwing a snow ball a massive 67.86m!

Le Tour - Day 1

Well the Tour beginning lived up to the hype.

Of the pre-race favourites Armstrong started very well, as to did Contador and Evans. There was, however, no surprise with the winner of the stage. Swiss time trial maestro and reigning Olympic champion Fabian Cancellara blew away the field, racing around the challenging circuit in 19mins 32 secs - a massive 18 seconds faster than 2nd placed Contador.

The top ten were as follows:

1. Fabian Cancellara (Swi/Saxo Bank) 19mins 32sec
2. Alberto Contador (Spa/Astana) +18 secs
3. Bradley Wiggins (GB/Garmin) +19 secs
4. Andreas Kloeden (Ger/Astana) +22 secss
5. Cadel Evans (Aus/Silence-Lotto) +23 secs
6. Levi Leipheimer (US/Astana) +30 secs
7. Roman Kreuziger (Cze/Liquigas) +32 secs
8. Tony Martin (Ger/Columbia) +33 secs
9. Vincenzo Nibali (It/Liquigas) +37 secs
10. Lance Armstrong (US/Astana) +40 secs

Tonight we head to the Provence region. Can Cancellara hold on to the yellow jersey or will the his team surrender it after just one day.....

Le Tour de France 2009

Tonight the Tour De France kicks off in the principality of Monaco. Otherwise known as the tax haven for the stinking rich and the heaven of all heavens for gold diggers.

Australia has a fair representation in the race, although Cadel Evans, and perhaps Michael Rogers, remain Australia's only realistic hopes of finally claiming the yellow jersey for more than just a loan period.

Yes, there is all the hype about Armstrong returning and whether he and Contador can gel together in the same team, but there are also a number of other issues about the race, not the least being who are the favourites for the race. Many betting agencies have Contador, Armstrong, Evans and Menchov as near favourites, whilst last years' winner, Sastre, is a bit off the pace already.

Importantly, if the 37 year old retiree (Armstrong) can come off a 4 yr retirement, which included running 3 marathons and numerous celebrity dates, and claim the yellow jersey it will be a slight against the abilities of the other cyclists in the race but at the same time underline Armstrong's own incredible drive to succeed.

The Tour kicks off with the 15.5km time trial tonight, which will sort out the men from the boys early on with a demanding hill section mid time trial, and over the race Full Time Sports will keep you up to date with the results and breaking news.

http://www.letour.fr/us/homepage_courseTDF.html

Owen to cross over to the Devil side...?

Is it possible? Could the ex-everton supporting, Liverpool, Real Madrid, and Newcastle United playing striker about to become a Red Devil? The red half of Liverpool have just had a nightmare come true.... Michael Owen is joining Manchester United!

Owen's career has been fantastic, although in recent years he has been dogged with injury and recently he has been linked with moves to clubs who would have struggled paying his weekly wage as a yearly salary. His time at Liverpool saw his rise and rise almost to the ranks of a Liverpool legend. In 293 games for the Reds he scored an amazing 158 times. Similarly, in a small stint with Real Madrid where he was underused, he still managed 18 goals in 41 games. His years at Newcastle United may not have been his best, what with only playing a handful of games in a four year spell, but when he did step onto the field his strike rate was still strong - scoring 30 times in 77 games. All in all Owen has scored 204 times in 418 club games since he debuted for Liverpool FC in 1997.

Sir Alex Ferguson knows Owen's ability and he can also smell a bargain (although does he really need it after Ronald's fee?). Owen is off contract and will cost Manchester United nothing in transfer fees. Owne will also only demand a fraction of his weekly wage that he had at Toonside.

The question that remains is can Owen get back to full fitness and play week in week out. Perhaps that is a moot point for Sir Alex who, even if he only got 10 goals from Owen per season, will consider it steal to have gotten a striker with a proven record of scoring, when playing that is, and not to mention pinch a ex-Liverpool player. It will be surprising to see Owen line up regularly, although if Berbatov keeps misfiring next season, he may be called into action more often than not.


Despite all possible outcomes for next season and the under or overuse of Owen, what is sure is that Owen has, as a result of his move to Old Trafford, now dropped dramatically in the list of greatest Liverpool players.

Pies disarm Bombers

It has been a rollercoaster ride of emotions for the AFL this week. Jim Steyns announced that he was battling cancer, Kevin Sheedy gave the biggest hint yet that he will return to coaching in 2010 with the Tigers, and clubs are realising that the season is fast approaching the business end.

By way of keeping the rollercoaster week rolling, the Pies were quitely confident of keeping their match winning run going, whilst the Bombers were hoping that their last minute Anzac day victory was no fluke. The Pies, however, put on a footballing masterclass to show that their recent run of victories, albeit against unlikely finals contenders, has no sign of stopping.

The Bombers on the other hand, whilst starting lively, trailed out to a whimper after the half time hooter. Nevertheless, it was fantastic football. What a game! Anyone who missed this game should search for a replay! Even Essendon fans should be heartened by their teams performance (at least the first half). But AFL fans in general should look for the highlight real of goals, grabs and tackles.

Some of the tackling was NRL-like, some of the running would have made Craig Mottram tired just from watching, and the athelticsim would have made basketballers think, 'hey, maybe I can learn something from these footy players' (instead of the other way around).

It was a freezing cold and damp night in Melbourne but the footy was played at such a pace that you would have thought it was a summers day. At times the pace of the play made Usain Bolt look pedestrian. Even more astounding were the skills the players showed, particularly Didak, Fraser, Cloke and Davis, who seemed to defy the moisture in the air and on the ground by picking up possessions and goals like they were hundreds and thousands at a kids party.

Some of the notable events of the game would have to be the following:

• Lovett-Murray's banana bender goal early in the first quarter (very Daniel Motlop-esque);
• Dale Thomas' goal from a fumbling Fletcher would have made any Socceroo proud (as would Clokes' left foot strike into the bottom right 'corner' of the goal);
• the horrible kicking for goal by both sides (take a bow Fraser, O'Brien and Essendon in general); and
• Didak's juggling diving grab.

All in all a good day at the office for the Pies, but one which the Bombers will like to forget. Definitely worth a replay for avid AFL fans and good preparation for Sunday's blockbuster.

http://www.foxsports.com.au/story/0,8659,25730469-5018851,00.html
http://www.theage.com.au/news/rfmatchreport/pies-return-fire-to-ease-ache/2009/07/03/1246127694902.html